Friday, March 28, 2008
I Want YOU!
To tell me what your favorite humorous Tony Horton P90X quote is...once we have a good sized list we will compile the top five or so into a poll to determine the overall winner. So listen up while you are working out and try to remember what sayings make you laugh and fall out of whatever exercise you were trying to do at the time! Just Hit the Comments line in blue ink at the bottom of this post to feedback your favorite.
Friday, March 21, 2008
Truisms of Team BeachBody
So I have been at this bad boy for almost 75 days now, and I am definitely pleased. I saw a picture of when I was at a friends wedding a few years back and I almost puked to think I looked that bad at one point..Denial...it's not just a river in Egypt. There are a lot of things I have learned as well in my journey to be X-like, and I'd like to share those with you:
-If someone has a Beachbody screenname that has 'Sexy' in it, 90% of the time they either have never posted a picture, or they have and they prove they should have picked a different screenname.
-It is amazing how little beer you need to get you tipsy when you haven't had one in over two months
-Little did I know that along with a highly improved physical state, I'd also get a degree in Nutrition by the end of P90X
-Dreya rolls are the work of the devil
-Hanging out in Shoulder Stand in the Yoga X workout is THE number one motivator for losing your gut
-I will never not laugh at Tony Horton getting hit in the face with the resistance bands by Sophia at the end of the Legs and back video
-Yoga is a lot harder than anyone ever expects it to be
-If I had known how hard this was all going to be, I definitely would have made my designated workout room closer to my bedroom
-I take more pills now every day than my grandfather who has Type II diabetes and three hearta attacks. The difference? I am taking my pills to make sure I don't GET diabetes or have a heart attack.
-Food that is good for you can often cost more than food that is bad for you
-I have so much more clothes now
-For those who say that working out and eating great takes too much time, I say I'd rather have ten more years to live than one more hour in my day.
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-If someone has a Beachbody screenname that has 'Sexy' in it, 90% of the time they either have never posted a picture, or they have and they prove they should have picked a different screenname.
-It is amazing how little beer you need to get you tipsy when you haven't had one in over two months
-Little did I know that along with a highly improved physical state, I'd also get a degree in Nutrition by the end of P90X
-Dreya rolls are the work of the devil
-Hanging out in Shoulder Stand in the Yoga X workout is THE number one motivator for losing your gut
-I will never not laugh at Tony Horton getting hit in the face with the resistance bands by Sophia at the end of the Legs and back video
-Yoga is a lot harder than anyone ever expects it to be
-If I had known how hard this was all going to be, I definitely would have made my designated workout room closer to my bedroom
-I take more pills now every day than my grandfather who has Type II diabetes and three hearta attacks. The difference? I am taking my pills to make sure I don't GET diabetes or have a heart attack.
-Food that is good for you can often cost more than food that is bad for you
-I have so much more clothes now
-For those who say that working out and eating great takes too much time, I say I'd rather have ten more years to live than one more hour in my day.
-
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
Maan joins the Spartans
TONITE WE DINE IN HELL....AS LONG AS HELL HAS NO SATURATED FAT AND IS LOW ON THE GLYCEMIC INDEX!
That's right...as a personal motivator, about three weeks ago I joined the legendary Spartans P90X workout group...with the goal that by Halloween, I and my fellow Spartans will be able to dress up as Spartans and have people going "Holy Shit!" because they are impressed and not disgusted or amused. So I have 18 days left on my first round of the X, and my side obliques are starting to press out such that I have the pack, which should subsequently break itself up into six separate pieces. So to Honor the Spartans, I post this motivational picture of badass abs himself, King Leonidas:
That's right...as a personal motivator, about three weeks ago I joined the legendary Spartans P90X workout group...with the goal that by Halloween, I and my fellow Spartans will be able to dress up as Spartans and have people going "Holy Shit!" because they are impressed and not disgusted or amused. So I have 18 days left on my first round of the X, and my side obliques are starting to press out such that I have the pack, which should subsequently break itself up into six separate pieces. So to Honor the Spartans, I post this motivational picture of badass abs himself, King Leonidas:
Monday, March 10, 2008
The Maan writes a New Book
Ok, folks, so I have a great idea for a children's book, and I want to bounce it off all of you before I send the idea off to Simon and Schuster...
The book tells the story of a personal trainer named Horton who, on the fifteenth of May in the Fitness Center called 'Cool', hears a small speck of dust on top of the pullup bar talking to him. It turns out the speck of dust is actually a tiny planet, home to a city called "Goo-ville", inhabited by microscopic-sized extremely obese and unmotivated inhabitants known as Goos.
The Goos ask Horton (who, though he cannot see them, is able to hear them quite well while doing corn cob pull-ups) to protect them from early onset diabetes, to which Horton happily obliges, proclaiming throughout the book that "a person's a person, no matter how small...as long as he BRINGS IT!". In doing so he is ridiculed and forced into a pilates class by the other personal trainers in the gym for believing in something that they are unable to see or hear. His chief tormentors are Dr. Atkins Vladikoff, the Krispy Kreme Brothers and the Nutrisystem Kangaroo, and the small kangaroo in her pouch. Horton tells the Goos that they needed to make themselves heard to the other trainers, lest they end up as part of "Lobster Bisque", which they finally accomplish. The Goos finally make themselves heard by ensuring that all members of their society do their best and forget the rest like they are trying out for the cover of Downward Dog Magazine. In the end it is the smallest Goo of all, Dominic, who provides the last Ohmmmm lift to be heard, thus reinforcing the moral of "a person's a person no matter how small....as long as they BRING IT!".
The book tells the story of a personal trainer named Horton who, on the fifteenth of May in the Fitness Center called 'Cool', hears a small speck of dust on top of the pullup bar talking to him. It turns out the speck of dust is actually a tiny planet, home to a city called "Goo-ville", inhabited by microscopic-sized extremely obese and unmotivated inhabitants known as Goos.
The Goos ask Horton (who, though he cannot see them, is able to hear them quite well while doing corn cob pull-ups) to protect them from early onset diabetes, to which Horton happily obliges, proclaiming throughout the book that "a person's a person, no matter how small...as long as he BRINGS IT!". In doing so he is ridiculed and forced into a pilates class by the other personal trainers in the gym for believing in something that they are unable to see or hear. His chief tormentors are Dr. Atkins Vladikoff, the Krispy Kreme Brothers and the Nutrisystem Kangaroo, and the small kangaroo in her pouch. Horton tells the Goos that they needed to make themselves heard to the other trainers, lest they end up as part of "Lobster Bisque", which they finally accomplish. The Goos finally make themselves heard by ensuring that all members of their society do their best and forget the rest like they are trying out for the cover of Downward Dog Magazine. In the end it is the smallest Goo of all, Dominic, who provides the last Ohmmmm lift to be heard, thus reinforcing the moral of "a person's a person no matter how small....as long as they BRING IT!".
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